Spy Gadgets

My kids are absolutely enthralled with spy gadgets--I can thank the Backyardigans for this I believe. Unfortunately, so is the ex.

First, it was checking my computer history at the end of the day, when I was busy with the kids bedtime routine or when I was allowed to go to the store. Then it progressed to spyware/keystroke loggers that would simply email him a report of my activity at intervals.

Then it was monitoring my cell phone usage and making sure he was able to get ultra-detailed billing reports. Then it was checking my text messages when I went to the bathroom or showered.

There was only one car, so when I was allowed access to it to get groceries, I had to say where I was going and how long I was going to be gone. And I don't mean in an "if anything happens to you" kind of way, I mean "if you deviate from the plan you laid out, you are a liar and there will be trouble" kind of a way.

I caught him checking my computer history--so I made sure everything I did was absolutely without question. Once I discovered he was actually reading my keystrokes, I had to completely withdraw into myself, and I set up a web of lies to distract him from what was about to go down. It worked, he bought it. And I bought myself extra time with that distraction to finish buying a house. Unfortunately the side effect of that was more random violence, but the end result was worth it--I got out.

I hurriedly set up a PayPal account with debit card so I could have money that was mine that he couldn't touch.

When he threatened to have my cell phone shut off, I had my mother buy me a new one and she sent it to me in a box of fabric. See? the fabric obsession is a great cover for all sorts of things. I then learned how to hide that phone in my bra, so he couldn't grab it. He became enraged once he found out about it, and destroyed the charger for it. I scrambled to find another one somewhere.

I got my car one year ago this weekend. We had to go to western Kansas for it because his dad "knew a guy that had a great deal on this car..." And it was a good $$ deal on a car that runs and was clean. The actual cost of that car was so much higher than what was on the sticker though. I left his parents house as soon as I could that weekend, bruised and bleeding where his parents couldn't see and went to my doctor as soon as I could the next day to make sure he hadn't permanently hurt me. I was told I wasn't allowed to take the kids with me in the car, since we didn't know if it would strand me on the side of the road or not. They all met his girlfriend in Hutch that afternoon instead. Quite an eventful 24 hours for him. ugh.

Two days before I was to move out, my laptop mysteriously broke. Ahh, yes... I wonder how that happened. *eyeroll* So I had to buy a new one. Actually that was fine with me, since I knew he hadn't touched the new one at all--I knew there wasn't any spyware on it. THen I had to get a slightly better computer for school that would run all the software I needed and I now have two computers that he hasn't touched. I like this.

Don't worry, we are still on topic here. Spy Gadgets--I haven't forgotten.

He has asked for my WI-FI passcode before so he could use his iphone on the network instead of via cell network. I told him no. He can deal with it. He isn't supposed to be over here anyway.

The Boy's birthday was Saturday--he is a big 9 year old. I made his a headboard for his bed, I painted him an airplane and made him curtains for his room. I found some Legos on clearance (they are never on clearance) so he would have something cool to unwrap, and I told him the story of his name. I know it wasn't much, but it was all I was able to do for him.

He was at his Dad's on Saturday, and was promised a birthday party with all his little friends. Turns out, that was a lie. There was no party, much to The Boy's disappointment--they went to Springfield to a pizza place with the girlfriend instead. He didn't even get a cake or blow out candles. Whatever. That is why I spent so much time Sunday doing it for him instead. He idd get a present from his dad. A laptop. A NICE laptop. With a webcam, an email address, a skype account, a whole bunch of different kiddie sites with logons and passwords, and other software and videos loaded on it.

The internet had been funky Sunday and yesterday, so I hadn't worried too much about it. But everything started working tonight. Pretty soon I see MY EX and MY INLAWS on the computer screen. They had been having a convo on Skype without my knowledge. I became enraged. I told him it was bedtime and computer time was over. As I'm trying to log out of everything, the inlaws keep trying to reopen the conversation window. Dammit, no people, take a hint!

I then had to sit down with Sam and tell him that I wasn't sure what the rules were just yet, but that there would be no computer until there were rules set up. Guess who ruined The Boy's birthday present? Yea, I'm a bad mom that gives crappy presents.

I know why he got a computer. I don't want to know what type of other software is on it. I hate that man and his fucking spygadgets.

It won't ever stop, will it? :-(